Ex Penna

Van Van is a formula, most often found as an oil, that is lucky in all respects while also removing all barriers to that success. It's the standard item in any good Hoodoo cupboard.

Oddly enough, though there are many successful recipes floating around, the only ingredient they have in common is Lemongrass. It would also seem that there are sellers whose Van Van oil is nothing but Lemongrass.

You can certainly create a starter version of this all-purpose formula with just Lemongrass in a carrier oil, but if you have access to the other Asian grasses found in the complete recipe, I recommend adding a generous dose of each:

Sometimes all you really need is some uninterrupted focus on a topic, and everything will turn out in your favor. This what you are doing when you create an arranged space.

Here we're talking about making room on a shelf, on your everyday altar, or on a special zone set up just for this purpose. Put all things related to the topic on that table as well as a hefty dose of items which are lucky for it and which work in favor of your goals. I like mixing in a few colored papers with positive messages on them and some auspicious tarot cards.

Move everything around until it looks and feels done. I know that I've seen such instructions in books and I've shuddered, but I can say that you will indeed know when it's done. Leave this layout untouched for a week. Take stock at that time. How are things progressing? Need more influence? A bigger push? Add some compelling herbs. Want to smooth things over and let them settle a bit? Change the color scheme to reflect a calmer atmosphere for the work.

Don't actually do a spell.  Let the casting be in the movement and setting of the space. Put all your energy into that and not into words or thoughts. Just allow the space itself to do the work.

You may be surprised at what happens.

Flakiness exists in every subculture. There's always going to be that set of people who just seem to float from place to place, ideology to aesthetic, without any real ties to any of it. Such is the way for the ones who inhabit the magical community.

Just what are we talking about when we say "flakes" or "phonies" or "fake witches"? Usually, when that kind of language is thrown around--and generally, with as much venom as possible-- the individual in question displays one or more of the following qualities:

• False knowledge or no knowledge
• Pretentious behavior
• Unwillingness to commit to a coven's expectations
• Free-will taken to a selfish degree
• Carefree turning to carelessness

It would appear that the spicy little clove bud has a contentious following; folks seem to either love it or hate it.  Either it's a sprightly reminder of home baking, childhood security, and family togetherness or it's headaches, pungent bitterness, and nausea.

Of course, this doesn't stop that little herb from being a fantastic staple to your magical supplies.  If you are part of the die-cloves-die camp, you might be able to soften their scent--but not their influence--by tempering clove with other additions while the rest of us enjoy them straight-up!

I realize that this is a difficult topic to breach for anyone, let alone the magical community where so many of us found acceptance after being shunned by the world outside.  To many, many practitioners, this is a safe and comforting place where we can be ourselves without judgment.

Dealing in weather magic is often a tricky matter.  First, though we know that there really is no such thing as a day without weather, we only really recognize weather systems.  This means that the build up to a rainstorm could go unnoticed and the after effects of hail might seem more important in our minds than the hail storm itself.  These details can make weather magic difficult because we're emphasizing the wrong phases where actual change can be made.

Second, there are a good deal of casters who feel strongly against any work designed to change or postpone weather systems.  Keep in mind that the organization of wind and water work as a constant swirl around the globe; nothing ever actually stops, it only dissipates to other areas or changes path altogether.  You can, and sometimes should, make this happen.  I was part of a group work to protect the East Coast from the category 4 Hurricane Irene in 2011.  By the time we had completed our spells, what was initally feared to be the "worst storm in a lifetime" was being given a progressively lower rating, and when it finally touched land, it had been downgraded to a "Tropical Storm."  Success!  So much was preserved by rerouting that huge system through the use of magic.  I don't regret my hand in it at all.

The charm I offer here, however, is much smaller and more localized.  If you have an event that must be spared from inclement conditions or necessary travel during a threatening season, this little work from Valerie Worth is your ideal spell.

Back in the "good old days" of my early twenties, when my husband and I were first married and living poor but happy, we ran with a very different crowd than we do now.  In fact, most of them were characters straight out of a comic book.

The tall, bookish guy in a trench coat with long hair and a wicked grin who had at least one hand over his face in every photograph.

The piggish grease-monkey whose limited vocabulary was full of made up words.

The all-day drunk with a good heart but terrible life choices.

And then there was the stocky scrapper who was fiercely proud of a European heritage that I'm pretty sure no one actually believed was real and had probably never done anything legal if he could help it.

He was probably the most common visitor to our house in those days and definitely a memorable part of many adventures.  This is only important to know because he figured prominently in my strongest memory of the formula I'm about to give you,  Happiness Powder.

As an open and proud spellcaster, I often had bundles of herbs drying in the kitchen, spell candles burning on an obvious altar in the living room, and various other magical items sitting in plain view around the house.  The night I made my first jar of Happiness Powder, I left it on the coffee table before putting it away.  When our guest came in and sat, he excitedly poured out a line and sniffed it because coke was the only "happiness powder" in his vocabulary.

Needless to say, I don't recommend this!  But, he was okay after that, though maybe not as happy as he had hoped.  Like I said, strange times and strange people.

The proper way to use Cunningham's powder is to sprinkle it around your environment, on people who could use cheering up, as an added ingredient in mojo bags, or use it to dust spell candles.

As you well know I am enamored with spoken charms and this is one of my very favorites.

To find power in a spell, first there must be beauty.  To find beauty, you need only be struck by the subject's uniqueness, its ability to radiate a deep well of self-awareness, shining like the refraction of moonlight on the walls of a watery cave.  That sparkle is beauty and the inspiration that stems from its power.

This charm, originating in the Finnish epic Kalevala, has an incredible amount of just such glow.  Though simple in language and lacking in direct imagery, it is a joy to speak, to feel on the lips, to read, to share.  How could such excitement fail to spread when it is used magically?  Remember this the next time you're driving a foggy road or, perhaps, beset with a more creative, metaphorical fog of mind or spirit.

Remember and recite.

To Banish Mists

Continuing in the vein of my adoration for Hoodoo is this week's offering: Hot Foot powder.  If you've never heard if it before, sit yourself down and get ready.  If you have, well, watch where you walk.

Do you have shitty neighbors?  Hot Foot them. 

Does your co-worker annoy you, sabotage you, or get in your way?  Hot foot them. 

Is that ex-friend still hanging around talking smack about you to others?  Hot Foot them. 


The swifter you clear out what threatens to derail your success, the easier it is to achieve it.



Now before you go at me with a wagging finger and disapproving glare for giving unwelcome people the boot, consider how affecting they can be.  Consider the stress they cause, the ensuing arguments, misunderstandings, and undue tension just from their presence.  You're not killing anybody, merely relocating them.  That can actually be a good thing, if they choose to see it that way.

But that's not your problem.  They are your problem and the solution is to make them disappear.  So here we go.

This is another formula without exact measurements and ingredients, but there are a few herbs that must be present in the basic recipe: hot pepper, sulphur, and salt.  Everything else--including the amounts--is a matter of individual tradition and taste.  I've seen others use High John root, Black Mustard, gunpowder (to make it work even faster), wasps' nests (to make it meaner), and the toxic Bluestone.  Here is the one I use:

Hot Foot Powder

I seem to be the only witch who isn't amazed by the idea of using birthday candles for spells.  There are tons of reasons why it's dumb, but here's just a few:

1. First, it's unlikely that you have only two minutes in which to cast a spell and this is what you chose.  You must realize that there is a big wide world of magic at your disposal and many varieties of spellcasting are quicker than candle spells.  Next time, think about spoken charms, formulas, knots, sigils, or even the use of thoughtforms and golems.  You can do better!
2. Birthday candles don't come in many colors, and what you can find are either pastel, covered in glitter, or decorated with other colors in grooves or stripes.  You need a gray candle?  A brown one?  Good luck.
3. You can't use them for some of the most interesting and powerful methods of candle spells, namely inscribing and loading.  I guess you can dress and dust them, but you'll spend twice as long doing so as it takes for the candle to burn.
4. Unless you're sticking that thing in a cake, get ready to have a hard time making it stand upright the whole time.
5. If you've tried to get around any of these problems just so you can keep saying that they're a workable substitute, you're trying too hard. 

So, now that I've got that off my chest, here's a better way.  If you simply must have candles for your spell, plan ahead and make tea light spell candles.

They are small, portable, fast burning, inscribable, stand securely on their own, and you can easily make them any color you want.  Here's how:

• Pop out the candle from its tin

• Remove the wick and set aside

• Fill a frying pan with 1/2 inch of water and heat on medium-low on the stove top
• Put the empty tins in the pan.  They should float on the water at this point.

• Dye your candles to match your intention: Sprinkle shavings from crayons in each tin (or, if you're a pro like me, just add liquid candle dye)

• Add a few drops of condition oils and/or powders or finely ground herbs to match your intention
• Drop into each tin the chunk of white wax
• Allow the warm water to slowly melt the wax (without boiling! It's too messy and can flip over your tins)

• Once all the wax is melted, and the color is to your liking, remove from the heat and let cool
• Before the candles solidify, put the wicks back in the center of each one.

• Sprinkle each candle with powders or ground herbs.  Make sure that the surface is cooled and solid or everything you add will just sink to the bottom.  I like to include some glitter, too!

• Now you're ready to cast a quickie spell any time, anywhere in style and with results as strong as a full-sized candle!

This is something that I simply cannot say enough about: the magical disclaimer.

Now, I understand the thought process behind the standards in this category, such as the psychic hotline's "For entertainment purposes only" and the herbalist's "This information is not meant as a substitute for professional medical treatment."  The law is not written for casters but for the public safety from injury and scams.  So, I got that.  No contest, that kind of thing should be part of our common compliance.

Here in central Pennsylvania, August is hot and humid.  We're right in the midst of a sticky, sunny summer with few reprieves and fewer rains. 

It can be hard to stand the heat (or worse, work in it!), so here's a little traditional Malayan charm (as recorded in Walter William Skeat's "Malay Magic" of 1900) to cheer you while you're outdoors.

The use of magical seals goes back to at least the 1700's, with simpler examples extending back much further.  Stylized and decorative, seals force the viewer to imagine its purpose more than recognize it.  If I drew a heart shape and put my beloved's name inside it, anyone picking it up (including my target!  Eeep!) would know my intention.  Instead, by using a seal (and possibly adding only the target's initials), a viewer might assume the image has magical importance, see the attention given to perfecting the figure in detail, and find a mysterious value that either brings them to a state of curiosity, fear, or both, but they will not know what it does.  That, to me, makes the magic of the seal a form which no practitioner should ever be without.

Now, you may be wondering, how the hell you're going to make a shortcut out of something that is already widely available and public domain such as magical seals. 

(Psst!  If you weren't aware of that fact, here are some links to get you started:)


Raphael's Ancient Manuscript of Talismanic Magic

The Lesser Key of Solomon

The Book of Ceremonial Magic




The real trick lies in your preparedness.  Sort through all available seals, talismans, and sigils--yes, this will take a long time--and decide the ones you're most likely to need at a moment's notice.  I keep a selection of seals in my travel kit, drawn on squares of colored papers that relate to the purpose of the seal.  This not only helps me to choose what I need faster but it also adds another layer of correspondence to a spell.

You may choose to draw your seals on any kind of paper, or you can paint them onto wooden discs or flat stones; choose whatever works best for you.  Take some Full Moon time to draw out all the seals you're likely to use.  Put a lot of care into it; though you won't be impregnating them with a purpose just yet, you do want them as accurate and perfect as you can make them.  Remember that they will someday help you out of many a tight jam.

So how do we use these pretty little scribbles?  Because you made them ahead of time, the only time you'll be doing empowering is in your moment of need.  This actually helps a lot because it is at that time that you have the most intent focus on the problem, as well as the clearest view of its solution. 

When using your seal, press it between your hands and focus on what you need it to do.  Visualize the image of it covering the whole problem as it is suddenly turned in your favor.  For larger issues, or those more desperate, take about 10 minutes to build up your internal fire through either physically exhausting exercise (the more overwhelming, the better) or sexual excitement.  When you simply cannot go on a moment longer, grab the seal and focus on it as you completely collapse.  Pour all that concentrated force into the image.  This is the standard way to fuel a newly made sigil, so using it for a seal which has hundreds of years of practitioners' use behind it will make it incredibly strong.

When you are done with either method, carry or place the seal as is appropriate and take comfort in knowing that your prior planning (and your friend, Quill, of course!) has saved the day again.

You can make a very helpful magical oil with just a few ingredients from your kitchen cupboard!  So let's get into the kitchen and get cracking!

While there are several ways to make this oil, what I offer here is the one I use: 

Flying Devil Oil

I've been one busy lady lately, what with comic book illustrating, another possible new venture in art, manuscript writing and editing, my Etsy shop, and a long stretch at my regular job.  So in lieu of my own tips this week, I found for you a trove of tips from witches around the world!  What could be more fun than sitting back, flipping through colorful photos, and learning soemthing new?  Enjoy!


Witch Tips on Tumblr

13 Tips for Being the Best Witch You Can Be

Magical Tips on Pinterest

The following is an excerpt from my as-yet unpublished manuscript, The Master Witch's Cheatbook: Transform Your Spells into Natural, Affordable, Powerful Works of Art, a guide to the gritty, fantastic world of magic for the beyond-beginner spellcaster.  If you enjoy this little snippet, let me hear about it!  Share your thoughts here in the comments, on Facebook, Twitter, private message, email, or Etsy.

Now that Spring is on its way again, I'd like to take the time to talk about one of my favorite magical herbs, Coltsfoot.

If you're out walking, this will liekly be the first bit of color you see once the snows melt.  Its name refers to the distinctive horse-print shape of the leaves.

One's taste in books is purely subjective.  This may seem obvious to the novel-readers out there, but if you listen to folks in the magical community, they expect everyone to want and need the same things from a book as they do.  Then the only task left is to read accordingly.

The books I cut my teeth on you might say were too advanced, outmoded, or not guarded enough for a newbie.  That may be true for you, but for me it's not.  On the other hand, lots of titles on the "best book ever" and "must have" lists I absolutely hate.  It's a waste of time trying to convert me to love them.

In short, there really is no definitive witchcraft book out there.  Instead, what we have is a huge variety of books with an independent tone and focus that is sure to speak to somebody.  Don't bother getting angry if not everyone else agrees with what you insist is the best.  Maybe next time you can do something really unique and share your opinion only when it does something worthwhile.

I recently ran across this and was absolutely fascinated!  I hope you are, too.

This charm comes from the impressive "Greek Magic: Ancient, Medieval, and Modern" by John Petropoulos.  While discussing the blending of Grecian, Roman, and Egyptian influences in the antiquity, this spoken piece of magic is shared: